I try my best to be the hardest worker in the room. I'm not perfect. There are days when I could give fifteen flying f_cks less about people. Even on those days, I care. I treat people equally. I expect respect because I give respect right back. That being said, I received a grim reminder earlier tonight: the definition of the word "respect" has, and will probably always be, contorted, in many ways.
I have a tendency of treating everyone in my workplace; from the cleaning crew to the ushers, part time people to full time people, employees to upper management, like family. It's a characteristic that has been instilled into me from birth, & that has carried into nearly my entire professional career. Not out of necessity, but out of nature. I shake hands, I place my hands on shoulders, I pat backs. It's what I do when I'm comfortable with those around me, particularly with people whom I spend more time than my actual family. In my experience, it's also helped to serve as something that says "I'm alright", "you can talk to me", "I respect you".
Not in this case.
I was told that I was not "equal" to certain individuals, that I am not "one of them", therefore I should treat them with "respect", by not showing such gestures. Because everyone in my environment should "know their place".
Know. My place. Three years doing this, and apparently, I not only haven't really earned my place, but I also don't even really know what my place is.
If "respect" means that I am expected to fear someone who, like me, laughs, cries, breathes, eats, sh_ts, pisses, dies, & will be judged by the only being who should be feared out of respect when this life is over; simply because they have a larger bank account than I, then I guess I don't know what respect is. Because I fear no man.
But I do respect those men & women who have a higher position than me professionally, and still do not allow that earthly power to get to their heads.
Fear does not equal respect. But fear can lead to a lack of respect. Even worse, it could lead to a bad reputation. And let's face it: nobody really wants to associate themselves with individuals who have a bad reputation. Not just professionally, but in life.
Respect:
a feeling or understanding that someone or something is important, serious, etc., and should be treated in an appropriate way
Fear:
to be afraid of (something or someone)
to expect or worry about
(something bad or unpleasant)
After having such an unpleasant experience, I fear that I may have lost respect for some people.
