I can feel myself on the brink.
I know it's there, I feel it.
But then it stops.

I don't know if it's tiredness.
I don't know if it's because Mom is so distraught. I don't know if it's because she told me that her eyes turned blue.

She wants us there. She's expecting us to be there tomorrow.
Is she waiting for us?
Will we make it in time?
What will we be walking into?

Was there anything more that could have been done before all of this?

Is Mom going to be strong enough to move forward after all of this is said and done?
Will any of us?

Have I even had the time to grieve "properly" since my last loss?

What is my lesson here, Lord?
What is my role in all of this?
What part of me will be missing this time around?

My only comfort
Comes in knowing where she will be going
That she will be at peace
She will see those who have missed her
She will see her Mother

But I don't know if that makes it hurt any less

Though I am merely numb right now

Numb but on the brink